Aliens
by Kingyo
Summary: Sawada Tsunayoshi was used to having many atrocious, unexpected things happen during his short existence on earth, but the last thing he had expected was an UFO landing on top of his school with an alien declaring that he was his uncle. CRACK- Oneshot: Making fun of typical aliens movies


Sawada Tsunayoshi was used to having many atrocious, unexpected things happen during his short existence on earth. He had been declared a mafia boss, nearly killed by a baby who just happened to be his tutor, sent back to the future – and then back again - and this was just only a very small portion of his said life. But the last thing he had expected was an _UFO_ landing on top of his school with an _alien_ declaring that he was his _uncle_.

_All right, THIS was getting ridiculous._

His jaw dropped wide open a while ago when the weird _spaceship_ had hovered above the school, ignoring the screaming student population. Truth be told, this was playing out a bit like those stereotypical movie scenes.

Tsuna stared. He wasn't too sure if he was supposed to run or hide at this point as his wide eyes followed the spaceship. In the theatres, the extraterrestrials always had laser beams and weapons of mass destruction and so there was no point in running, right?

Yamamoto, who stood beside him, leaned out of the classroom window in fascination. "Wow," he declared with a silly grin plastered on his face. "That looks so real! I wonder how it flies…"

His comment only earned his incredulous looks from the rest of the remaining classmates, who had yet to run out screaming in fright.

On the other hand, Gokudera, the UFO fanatic, had lost himself in excitement. The sliver-hair teen had promptly ran out, chasing the obscure thing with sparkling eyes while squealing like a fan girl. Tsuna wasn't too sure what to think of that.

* * *

Eventually, Tsuna found himself being reluctantly dragged off to the rooftop by the curious baseball captain and the duo was soon joined by a panting Gokudera.

As they carefully swung the roof's door apart (you could never know what was behind), Tsuna could not help but gasp at the amazing sight. The sliver UFO had finally chosen to land on the rooftop, after hovering around the field for a bit - much to Hibari's chagrin. But before Kyoya could attack, an odd glow enshrined the enraged disciplinary leader and effectively paralyzed him.

_Alien technology_, Tsuna decided nervously, torn between helping a furious looking Hibari, running away, or satisfying his immerse curiosity on the UFO.

But Yamamoto, as usual, had already started to head towards the silver object with him in tow.

"What are you doing Yamamoto?" Tsuna hissed under his breath. "It could be dangerous!"

"Mah, mah," Yamamoto grinned, rapping the metal leg of the object with his knuckles. "Don't be silly! This is just toy, Tsuna."

Tsuna could only grit his teeth, shaking his head in frustration at his oblivious friend. Nevertheless, he admitted that he was extremely intrigued, eyes inspecting the UFO meticulously.

"This is not a toy, you baseball idiot!" Gokudera growled, with less venom then usual, walking around the spacecraft with a distant look in his eyes. He was almost drooling at the UFO, studying his obsession in fascination.

The spacecraft was much smaller then they had expected. It was a perfect sphere, suspended on four thin legs, and looked almost menacing as it loomed over the boys.

A burst of cool air and smoke suddenly streamed out from the bottom of the circular space ship, causing the trio to leap back warily.

Tsuna was starting to feel afraid, very afraid.

"Guys," he gulped. "Shouldn't we start running?" Even he said that, his knees were probably shaking too much to do so.

A ray of light began to form directly under the sphere and began to enlarge as the hole slowly opened. Tsuna was forced to shield his eyes when it became too bright for his comfort.

_Oh, no… _Tsuna quaked in terror. He had watched enough movies to know what was going to happen.

A figure, featured shadowed by the bright light started to float down to the roof and as the lights dimmed a blond man, no, alien stood in front of them, scratching his head a little.

Tsuna stared warily at the person. He _looked_ pretty human.

No one moved for a minute. Then the group jumped when door suddenly burst opened and a woman skipped in.

"Mom?" Tsuna asked in confusion. "No, _wait_, he might be dangerous" -his mother had already thrown herself at the blond man, err, alien.

"Don't be silly Tsu-kun," his mother chided him, giggling. "He won't hurt me."

She gave the man, no, alien a tight squeeze and took a step back, patting his hair gently. By this point, the poor boy's legs had given way, causing him to sluggishly fall onto the ground. "What's going on?" he wailed in bewilderment, burying his face into his hands. "And who is he?"

The blond alien placed his hands on his hips and chuckled. "I am your uncle."

The three teenagers stared at him blankly.

"No, no," Yamamoto started laughing merrily. "You've got it all wrong! It should have be 'I am your father!'"

The alien gave him an odd look. "No, I'm Dino. His mother's brother."

"Whoa, cool!" Yamamoto gushed. "Your uncle is great, Tsuna!"

Tsuna spluttered in confusion as he turned to his mother. "Wait, what? Youareanalientoo?"

Nana tilted her head a little and placed a finger on her chin absentmindedly. "Ara? Didn't I tell you?"

"NO!" Tsuna shrieked, pulling at his hair. His eyes widened a fraction when he realized something. "OH MY GOD. DOES THAT MEANS I'M A HALF-ALIEN?"

Behind him, Gokudera was jumping enthusiastically in delight at the revelation that his amazing, beloved Juudaime also was an alien. "I knew Juudaime was so amazing! His extraterrestrial-ness makes him even greater than ever!"

"NO!" Tsuna cried in denial. _First the mafia, then an alien ancestor?_

Dino, his apparent alien uncle, laughed good-naturedly. "How have you been, my dear sister?"

Nana gave the man a sweet smile. "It's been great! Would you like to come to my house for tea?"

"NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR TEA!" Tsuna yelped, but the group ignored him.

"I'll love to," his _UNCLE_ sighed. "But mother wants to see her grandson soon. You haven went back for ages and you know how she gets."

"My, I won't want her sending an army to invade earth again would I?" Nana replied, gasping a little.

Tsuna's eyes budged at the conversation. _Wait what? Invade earth? AGAIN?_

"Tsu-kun," his mother turned to him. "Go visit your grandmother with Dino, okay?"

Tsuna blinked, unable to process what his mother had asked him to do. That was when his _uncle_ causally picked him and slung him over his shoulders, making him squirm in protest.

"WAIT!" he wailed over Dino's shoulder. "I DON'T WANT TO!"

Nana tsked. "Don't be spoiled, Tsu-kun! Be a good boy and listen to your uncle."

The flabbergasted boy moaned at the ridiculous situation, feeling tears of exasperation well up in his eyes.

He gasped when he felt himself being lifted by the light under the spacecraft, struggling futilely against Dino's death grip.

"Now, be careful on your way back, Dino," Nana yelled, waving a teary goodbye. "Don't crash into the moon again!"

_The moon? AGAIN?_

"I know sister!" Dino shouted happily in reply before the duo vanished into the hole. "Don't worry! I'll take care of my nephew!"

As they disappeared into the sphere, Tsuna felt faint. As he started to fall into that safe, comforting place called oblivion, there was only one thought in his mind.

_He was getting adducted by an alien…with his mother's approval. _

* * *

**_A/N:_**

**_A jumbled up story I had in my mind for a few hours. Let's just mess with Tsuna's life. Hoped you guys liked it. Beta-ed by graceful sunshine._**


End file.
